The Vampire who blocked his own shot
by figsixment
Summary: Angel tries to make up with Spike after being a jerk. Sequel to Me vs. Spike vs. Myself. Originally written for something else but thought it would make a better spangel.


**Rating: PG- 13**  
**Subject: Angel wants Spike's forgiveness after his little stunt, but reader only gets Angel's side of the conversation...**  
**Dedicated to: Anyone who read the other one**  
**Song:The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot- Brand New**

b **The Vampire Who Blocked His Own Shot**

_**"Angel I love you! You asshole, you're the one I wanted."**_

"I love you Spike, I didn't know…" /b 

So much time has passed since then- three weeks to be exact. Three weeks ago I missed my chance.

Anyone who feels like an asshole raise their hand.  
Yep that's all me.

_If it makes you less sad, I will die by your hand.  
I hope you find out what you want.  
I already know what I am._

He won't even look at me. He doesn't go out after shows. He barely even shows any energy performing.

I fucked up so bad this time.

Part of it's his fault… Right? I mean, if he'd have just shown that he reciprocated some of the feelings I was throwing at him for months.

Who am I kidding; I'm a selfish, blind, asshole.

_And if it makes you less sad, we'll start talking again.  
And you can tell me how vile I already know that I am.  
I'll grow old and start acting my age.   
I'll be a brand new day in a life that you hate. _

Look I know I did a very horrible thing, but I was so angry with you. I wanted revenge…  
I longed for you so long and well, I thought you would never notice how I felt, and if you did, you'd never feel the same.

I thought if I couldn't make you love me I'd make you hate me.

You don't even need to say it; I know I'm a stupid fuck.

Yeah immature came to my mind too.

Look I'll do anything to get a second chance. Even if we can't be romantically involved, we could still be friends.

Couldn't we?

We could start over, a new life…

_A crown of gold.  
A heart that's harder than stone.  
And it hurts a whole lot, but it's missed when it's gone. _

I'll treat you like a king.

I understand that you've had to harden up you heart since… that night.

I know I hurt you deeply, but I'm prepared to make that up and so much more. Just because I fucked up, doesn't mean you should throw your heart away, I'll help heal it.

Damn it Spike, I'm on my fucking knees!! I understand how you feel, now stretch that out over years.  
That's how long I've needed you, that's how long I waited.

_Call me a safe bet.  
I'm betting I'm not.  
I'm glad that you can forgive.   
I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget. _

No I really don't think you should bet on me pulling shit like that again. Call it a crime of passion…

It's not enough that you forgive me.

You told me you loved me. Now you have to deal with the fucking well you opened up.

Forget that… It's in the past. I want to be your future.

_If it makes you less sad, I'll move out of the state.  
You can keep to yourself.  
I'll keep out of your way. _

I'll do anything you want so we can get through this. I'll give you time I'll stay away.

Just promise you won't become a hermit again.

Yeah, I do think you should fall in love with someone else, if you can't love me…

_And if it makes you less sad, I'll take your pictures all down.  
Every picture you paint, I will paint myself out._

I'll remove every trace of myself from your life, but I won't remove you from mine.

Fuck, I'll quit the band if it'd get you back.

_It's cold as a tomb, and it's dark in your room,   
When I sneak to your bed to pour salt in your wounds.  
So call it quits or get a grip.  
Say you wanted a solution.  
You just wanted to be missed._

I'm beginning to think you just want to see me beg.

Yes I'm laughing at you, and myself I guess.

Well, less then a month ago you told me you loved me then all but disappeared.

Yeah, I think it's ludicrous, but it's so insane it's daffy.

No I didn't call you a duck.

No I think Xander would make a better Daffy Duck.

Yeah Anya does look like Donald.

_You are calm and reposed.  
Let your beauty unfold.  
Pale white, like the skin stretched over your bones.  
Spring keeps you ever close.  
You are second hand smoke.  
You are so fragile and thin. _

God you're magnificent even when you're miserable.

No I'm not ass kissing, I was saving that for the make-up sex.

You have this pixyish beauty- the sculpted face, your pale skin, the slight frame, and that unnatural hairstyle.

Yes I do think you're gorgeous.

An unnatural hairstyle is the hairstyle that could be defined as the slicked back peroxide on your head.

_Standing trial for your sins.  
Holding onto yourself the best you can_

You wouldn't be losing your resolve by giving in; you would be subdued by my irresistible charm.

Oh I'm not? Thanks::Chuckle::

_You are the smell before rain.  
You are the blood in my veins. _

Even if you can live without me, I can't live without you.

Call me a safe bet. I'm betting I'm not.

Why do you keep saying "I bet", or "I guarantee", I'm not that predictable, am I?

How do you figure?! You weren't expecting me to beg for forgiveness, and I did.

_I'm glad that you can forgive. I'm only hoping as time goes, you can forget._

As I lean down to kiss you, and I say a silent prayer, that this time I don't land on my ass.

There goes that idea…  
…at least this time you're down here with me.

Sure! We can talk about make-up sex…

**Finish**

Thanks!!


End file.
